I'm so angry and frustrated I cannot sleep. Not I am frustrated because I can't sleep. Between work drama, ex-husband drama, and these deep scarring wounds of losing my best friend, I feel a bit overwhelmed. I'm trying to meditate over it. And honestly the only thing that has been slightly helping as I lay here is picturing my runs and retracing them, critiquing them, and psyching myself up for the next one. But, little snippets start seeping in and it's gone. Back, lush, green-wooded roads fade into black and red, energy-sapping visions of angst and despair.
No ones fault but my own. I know. I can only be bothered by the things I let bother me. I've come to a bitter acceptance of some things, yet I still find myself amidst many battles within and without.
So applicable to my work and ex issues:

Close enough to start a war,
All that I have is on the floor,
God only knows what we're fighting for,
All that I say, you always say more,

I can't keep up with your turning tables,
Under your thumb, I can't breathe,

So I won't let you close enough to hurt me,
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me,
I can't give you the heart you think you gave me,
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables,
To turning tables,

Under honest guise I see, ooh,
Where love is lost, your ghost is found,
I braved a hundred storms to leave you,
As hard as you try, no, I will never be knocked down,
I can't keep up with your turning tables,
Under your thumb, I can't breathe,

So I won't let you close enough to hurt me, No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me,
I can't give you what you think you gave me,
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables,
Turning tables,

Next time I'll be braver,
I'll be my own savior,
When the thunder calls for me,
Next time I'll be braver,
I'll be my own savior,
Standing on my own two feet,

I won't let you close enough to hurt me,
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me,
I can't give you what you think you gave me,
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables,
To turning tables,
Turning tables, yeah,
Turning, oh.